The RPGN Tavern

[Locke Cole]

Alas, my old cafe was boarded up and shut down, so I've decided to open up a tavern here in this new world. Come on in, have a drink, and try not to start any bar fights, or I'll have to sick tavern security :cop: on you.

On the menu today:

:burger: - 5gp (Cheese and Bacon extra :p)
:icecream: - 3gp (Cookies and Cream Flavour!)
:pizza: - 5gp (Hawaiian, Canadian, Double Pepperoni or Vegitarian style!)
:coffee: - 2gp (Misc drinks, we serve everything and anything.)

Payment can be made in the jar on the counter. The :chef: is on duty to serve.

[silverDistortioN]

so who's the chef then? =)

[Locke Cole]

Uhm.... hmm.... good question!

*posts a "Now Hiring" sign in the window*

:)

[DarkSoul]

*Walks in and orders a Pizza*

Can I get extra cheese with that?

*Sits down at a bar stool and waits for his meal*

So how ya all doing today?

[silverDistortioN]

...give me a minute while i get my application in order...

[Locke Cole]

*goes and gets DarkSoul's :pizza:*

Extra cheese you say? I gave it a 3 inch layer of cheese :p I hope thats enough.

That'll be 6gp, please. :)

[DarkSoul]

*hands over ther GP with an extra tip*

Ahhh!! Just enought cheese also! When I usually say extra cheese others give just a lilbit. You actually gave me extra =D

Thanks.

[silverDistortioN]

okay, my curriculum vitae: http://sixty9.servebeer.com/foxchef.gif

hire me! ^.^

[Locke Cole]

Hired! I'll be by the tavern every so often to collect the GP from the jar, and pay you your wages. You can update the menu as you see fit, since you're the new cook.

[Zedie9]

:bouncy: Before you leave, Locke, I wanted to ask... Did you make sure this establishment wasn't built upon any sewers, catacombs, burial grounds, tunnels, or other sorts of potential predicaments? :angel:

[Locke Cole]

Well, now that you mention it... the guy I bought the land from sure was in a hurry to sell it. He said something about an enchanted forest... but he was old, and I figure its just rubbish :)

[DarkSoul]

*looks over at the crack in the floor and notices a small light but then looks away just ignoring it*
Ya, Probably a bunch of rubbish. Enchanted forests are all over the place nowadays.

[Kyari]

All over, eh? Yeah, pretty much every forest is somewhat enchanted . . .

Well, I have a sixth sense for structural integrity, and I say this building is created on solid ground, and the walls appear to be solid and uncovered as well. Not to say there aren't any passages . . . XD

[TrueSephiroth]

I'm guessing this is a modern Tavern since theres pizza and coffee.

*Brings a vending machine in on a dolly*

Hey Why not I don't think you'd mind Besides I put it in here and have a company come by and restock it.

Just because we moved worlds doesn't mean I'm not still rich!

This is a cool one too its got soft drinks as well as refrigerated items and good old junk food.

Drinks 25Gil, 2 GP:
CocaCola Classic
Dr.Pepper
A&W Root Beer
Plus a few others

Refrigeration is for the delly meat sandwhiches 50 Gil, 5 GP:
Ham And cheese on white
Ham and Cheese on Rie
Bologna and cheese White and rie
Turkey and cheese white and rie
Chicken and cheese white and rie
Chocobo and chees white and rie (Hey they died of natural causes and none are killed for the meat) Its a friendly sandwhich.

Junk Food:
Candy bars 20 Gil, 1 GP; Bagged items 25 Gil 2 GP:
3 Musketeers
Milky Way
Crunch
York Patties
Fastbreak

Chips-Original, Barbeque, and sour cream and onion.
PorkRinds

More things will be added at request.

Just tell the guy who restocks it to add one, he comes every day at 1:00 PM.

[Giea]

*Shows badge* Health inspector here... this place ain't too bad... BUT! First I need to know the owner of the place and I need a menu and everything on the menu to pass the inspeciton =)):tophat:

[Zedie9]

:D Well, I know when the Café had its grand opening, Locke had some Mogs dancing and singing, or somesuch. I demand the same entertainment this time! :furious: ;)

[IceBurner]

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

Couldn't resist ;) Anyway, I need 4 million buckets of fish paste, on the double!

[silverDistortioN]

*puts a fish in a blender and empties it into four million miniature buckets*

there ya go! and at a quarter apiece... that would come out to... one million gp, please! ^.^

...plus tip, if you will. =)

[Locke Cole]

TrueSephiroth dares bring a COKE machine into our tavern?! *replaces all the coke with pepsi*. Much better.

Entertainment eh? Alrighty then... *sets up a stage with a microphone* Karaoke! Who's up?

[BAMAToNE]

Noooooooooooooooooo!!111one

*installs a Coke machine in a room only available to TrueSeph and myself (and other Coke lovers ;) )*

[Locke Cole]

I saw that! :cop: Quickly, after him!

[silverDistortioN]

*chases after him and...*

:bash:

tip stealer. =P

[Giea]

TrueSephiroth dares bring a COKE machine into our tavern?! *replaces all the coke with pepsi*. Much better.

Entertainment eh? Alrighty then... *sets up a stage with a microphone* Karaoke! Who's up?Errr... So you're The Owner of this place Eh?? Well.. I'm gonna have to give you a violation for letting a Ugly Little Fox Work In Here... Ewww and I have Some Hair in my Spaghetti *Hands Locke a Sticker* C+!

[silverDistortioN]

you racist! i'm going to report you!

prejudice against foxes... what's the world coming to.

[Giea]

*puts a muzzle on Silver* your going to the pound!! har har!

[silverDistortioN]

*undoes the muzzle with his HANDS and tackles Giea, hogtying him with it*

looks like an A to me... don't you think, Locke?
now, if you will, i'm off to scribble up a new menu...

[Kyari]

Y'know, I do like Pepsi better, but you guys are just crazy.

Gimme a Beef Jambalaya and don't skimp on the pure, searing, spicey heat.

[OutcastedNomad]

I'll take a burger and a coke please. I gotta find a job.

[silverDistortioN]

one ground pound with a donkey choker coming right up!

...as for the Jambalaya, i'll need a minute...
*looks up a recipe on the internet...*

[Locke Cole]

*places giea into the dungeon*

Every so often, just toss those unco-operative customers down into the dungeon. Our uhh... security guard... gets hungry now and then. Just be sure to close the door behind you.

[Kyari]

Yeah. That way, the smell doesn't get out. A lot.

And where's that jambalaya? :D

[silverDistortioN]

(awesome... now i don't have to double post to give Kyari his jambalaya. =)

*hands Kyari a bowl of jambalaya with enough chili in it to kill a midget*
enjoy! ^.~

[Kyari]

Yay! Now it's time to kill some midgets . . .

Good stuff, man!

[TrueSephiroth]

Lock I was being nice when I put the machine in here its not just a coke machine. Like I said ask the guy who stocks it and he'll put it in there.

The prices won't change as long as the item isn't too outlandish.

*Gets Dr.Pepper and ham sandwhich from machine then sits down and eats*

[Yuffie]

I'M HERE!!!!!! :D

*snatches her apron off of Silver*

Quit trying to steal my job! :p

OOH!!! KARAOKE!!!!

*dives onto the stage*

Before I begin I think I'll add some shameless advertising. :D
On Sept 11th I'm in a show called WOW over here, it's £10 each...so about $15...but because I like you all so much you can buy them for $20 ;)

[Zedie9]

:D Yoo-hoo, SIlver! I'd like to place an order... I want two sorcerous orbs, still attached, and chilled, please - they're always a bit livelier chilled. ;)


:lick:

[Yuffie]

Speaking of orbs, I made the recent discovery that chocolate profiteroles are really yummy. :)

[silverDistortioN]

*snatches the apron back*
it's not my fault if your little cafe closed down. =P

as for the sorcerous orbs... *glances over back at Yuffie*
...can't find any. so instead, here is a pic of some boobies: a pic of some boobies (http://www.micktravels.com/galapagos/boobies/29-masked_boobies.jpg)

[Yuffie]

My orbs...um...splodges :p are already accounted for, not for sale! :p
My cafe did NOT close down!!!! ¬¬
Whatever happened to it....Silver did it!! :(

[silverDistortioN]

o, crystal splodge! reveal to me what my future holds!
*rub rub rub... gazes closer*
...i see... much pain and suffering soon to be inflicted on me.

anyway... are you going to order something or just sit there all day?
my tips are feeling awfully nonexistent at the moment.

[kai]

*orders liquid cocaine* :blink:

[silverDistortioN]

liquid cocaine... coming right up...
*takes out a shot glass... pours water into it... and empties several spoonfulls of the powdery white to it.*
here ya go!

[TheDragonKnight]

Strolls in looks around, looks at the trap door in the floor then flings in open and storms down. Shortly a large gout of flame shoots out and a muffled voice can be heard. "HEY! how long have you had my dragon down here?!? Ive been looking for her for the last 150 years!

TheDragonKnight pokes his head back out of the trap door and then looks at the size of the entrance "but... how the hell did you fit her down there?"

TDK finishes climbing back out of the hole and sits down "oh well gimem equal parts rootbeer, orange C-Plus, sprite and pepsi ina 72 oz glass"

[silverDistortioN]

*pours him his big ol' drink*
that's 5 gp with it supersized...

...i presume we built the place around the dragon. or no? =)

[Zedie9]

:D Certainly! Locke needed something to heat the pizza oven, no? ;)


And Yuffie, I'm afraid Silver is correct. Locke mentioned that the old Café had closed down, while the proprietor had relocated to another universe. Whatever the case, you didn't show up quickly enough: Silver got the bartending job. :hmm: Unless you want to fight him for it...? :pirate:

[Yuffie]

A PIRATE SMILEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

But anyway, you bet I'll fight for my job!! My splodges are better than Silver's and mine can be enhanced with padding!! :evilgrin:

Plus this place needs it's lucozade mascot. :cool:

*pours lucozade over Silver*
Fear the stickyness!!! And the WASPS!!!! :evilgrin:

So there's the pain part....not as soon as you'd predicted so I'll make up for that.
*kicks Silver*
Check it out you're psychic!! :D

[TrueSephiroth]

YaY we still hve :rofl: and :chocobo:!

I'm so happy!:D

[silverDistortioN]

psychic? awesome. =)
i'm sure Locke would prefer having a psychic chef over a chef who wastes precious lucozade by pouring it on people.

...sweet, delicious lucozade. all over my body. what am i to do...

[Giea]

Oooh Ooh Guys!! I found out what the 5th Rank is!!... It's Scary Spice from the Spice Girls!! Wohoo! Hmph... where can I find a good Spice Girl around here.. =/

[Zedie9]

...sweet, delicious lucozade. all over my body. what am i to do...
:knockedout: Well... Yuffie mentioned wasps... :amazed:

[silverDistortioN]

yeah, i know Zedie... i was hoping someone would say something along the lines of *watches as a swarm of hungry wasps devour him alive*

then i would go, "tee hee! they tickle! ^.^"
...which they do.

but you totally screwed up my timing.

[Zedie9]

:amazed:


*watches as a swarm of hungry wasps land all over Silver's sticky, nekkid body*

[Is that better? :p ]

[kai]

*sees the wasps. notices they are not ordinary wasps, they are infact metalic korean made wasps*

:goodluck:

[silverDistortioN]

*sigh...*

tee hee! they tickle! ^.^

[kai]

. . . . . . . . . . . :yeahright:

(they must be made like their guitars :nana: )

[TheDragonKnight]

Plucks a wasp out of mid air and begins picking his teeth with it "knew these damn things had to be good for something. and would you mind not refering to silvers naked body thats not the kind of image i want to think of right before bed...." Knocks back some more of his drink "well i certianly have enough sugar, guess i stay up all night, the alternitave is definately alot worse"

[silverDistortioN]

you know you want me. ^.~

[jetblue]

Here comes jetblue to add mystery and intrigue.


A tall man in a fedora and wet trench coat with a eyepatch opens the tavern doors letting cold air and rain in.
Closes them behind him with a loud thunk.
Looks around.Thinks to himself,"this place was sure noisy on the outside.Quiet as a tomb now.Every one giving me the evil eye."
Walks toward the bar notices the stools are crooked.
"How ya doing bartender,let me get a black coffe.Freakish weather were having for august."bartender says nothing,goes to coffe maker.
Removes hat coat and places on stool next to him.
Bartender returns with coffe,"Im a P.I. out of midland city,the names jetblue",shows badge to bartender,"Im looking for 2 missing people who were last seen around here."
"They had weird nicknames,they both started with a J.They came here about 4 months ago"bartender doesnt say a word.
Hears light whispering in the back.
"mind If I smoke here?"pulls out silver ciggarette case out of suit pocket.
(waits for responce)





(Am I playing this right or was I just supposed to order some food?Locke is the bartender right?The owner is usally the bartender.Should I have waited for a responce when I ordered coffe?I didnt give him any dialoge.)

[silverDistortioN]

actually, i tend bar... and yes, i think you should have waited for me cuz i seem a bit out of character there.

"sorry, no smoking... you can drown yourself in alcohol, but you have to go outside to smoke."

[jetblue]

Looks around see's ashtrays on tables.Puts cigarette case away.
"You been working here long?"swats hornet that lands on neck.
"You seem to have a bug problem around here"
can here in backround someone starting up kareoke machine,sounds like cher.

[Lord Draud]

*comes up form the trap door* hey you guy i need another subject for my experiments the last one got turned into a vampire and flew away how am i ever gonna get an work done with out more helpless innocents???

[Yuffie]

Can't remember much Cher I'm afraid...but I know a dance to "I need a hero" :D
Silver, I'm gonna need some lucozade for this one! On the rocks. :)

[silverDistortioN]

*squeeges out some lucozade from his hair into a glass of ice...*
there ya go! this one's on the house. ^.~

2 gp labor fee, please. =)
...plus tip.

[Yuffie]

Um...what are those little white flakes floating in it?

...is that a fish..? O.o

[silverDistortioN]

i like to refer to them as... little bits of sexy.

and don't drink the fish. she's my friend.

[Mithrandir]

Are pets allowed in here? Cause I brought my T-rex....to keep me safe from Balrogs. Someone keeps sending them at me. They all have a big Z painted on them. WOnderewho that could be...

[Kilu]

My bet is the evil evil Z button of GC pad. Makes sense, no?

[jetblue]

P.I. jetblue thinks to himself while drinking his coffe,"what the hell is going on here!!! I knew I shouldnt of taken this case."
Hears a erie sound from the trap door.
thinks,"Oh hell ya those two guys Im looking got killed here!!! How am I going to get out of this place alive.
"Hey waiter how much I owe you for the coffe?",why does he have cat ears?...Are they real?

[silverDistortioN]

that's 5 gp, please. =)

...and they're not cat ears, they're fox ears. cat ears usually don't come this big.
but could you please ask your questions out loud from now on? people might get suspicious when it starts to seem like i'm reading your mind.

[TheDragonKnight]

Looks up from his drink as yet another wasp buzzes by his head then stand up "dammit im gettign sick of those things!"

Strides quickly to the center of the room looks straight up and then whips a small glowing gem at the ceiling where it sticks, then mutters a few archane words and smiled grimly as the wasps all began to fly towards teh celing, some not under their own power.

TheDragonKnight sat back down and orderd a refill for his drink and muttered "that'll teach the little fuckers"

[jetblue]

"Oh my god!!!You can read my mind!"
"That means you read my mind earlier when I thought how soft your ears looked.That I wanted to touch them"
"Irregardless,Im getting out of here see!",pulls pistol from shoulder holster.
walks slowly towards door.
"Heres 10gp,no one can say jetblue P.I. is not a good tipper"
"Dont anybody move till I get outta here see",swinging pistol around walking toward door....


(someone kill me off, make it a nice quick death with bravery and dignity)

[Giea]

bah!! I hate cher... *stabs Yuffie in the back with a knife* finally.. peace *puts headphones on and looks cool*

[Yuffie]

Urgh... :knockedout:

Giea...but...I wasn't singing Cher!!!

And to be honest I think they look kinda like those ears of that fluffy Gizmo thing from Gremlins. :D

You can't kill me off, I'm the serving wench dammit!!

[Zedie9]

i like to refer to them as... little bits of sexy.

and don't drink the fish. she's my friend.
:rofl: This description made me laugh out loud - I found the delivery to be perfect. :thumbup:

Balrogs. Someone keeps sending them at me. They all have a big Z painted on them. WOnderewho that could be...
:emlaugh: Ehm... Zorro? :angel:

You can't kill me off, I'm the serving wench dammit!!
Ah! So you finally recognize the moniker and acknowledge your status?! Mwahahahaha! :evilgrin:

[Giea]

Urgh... :knockedout:

Giea...but...I wasn't singing Cher!!!

And to be honest I think they look kinda like those ears of that fluffy Gizmo thing from Gremlins. :D

You can't kill me off, I'm the serving wench dammit!!
Ooops.. just here to do my Bounty Killin Job Ma'am Yuffie Person =)

[DarkSoul]

*Gets off his bar stool*
Ahhh, that was good food. *Looks towards the exit*
Well I got to go do some questing. There's items to find, worlds to comqure and woman to meet!
*Starts to equip his questing gear* *Katachi equipped, Focused energy rifle equipped, Computer assisted targeting hud system <Head Gear> equipped, Cool looking Duster equipped <Cowboy to the ground like jacket>, relly hitech boots equipped*

Have a nice day all =)

[Mithrandir]

So then, it's settled, I'm going against this Z person. But first I'll have a glass of that...*points to the bottles behind the barman*

[TrueSephiroth]

You said everyone was giving you the evil eye they don't seem to be fullfilling that so here's two for you.

*hands jetblue a pair of evil eyes*

They are from a mysterious creature that lives in my world called a Tonberry.
He ain't no fruit either! He's a mean mother with alot of health. I'm not sure if these have powers or not.

Have fun!

*Punches him in the face making him fly out through the door*

Hehehehehe.

I wonder if you'll be a worthy opponent for once. I'm getting bored with the characters around here.
If you can entertain me you might die and if not you will live with shame for eternity.

[Charon]

Ooooh we have a tavern. I'll have to read up on this thread when I get some time.

[Yuffie]

Sorry, you can't have those bottles, they're my not very secret lucozade supply. :)

But you can have...ummm.....this'll do! :D
*hands him an odd coloured and textured liquid*
Found it in Silver's bag.

[Zedie9]

So then, it's settled, I'm going against this Z person. But first I'll have a glass of that...*points to the bottles behind the barman*
:wonder: Zima...? :angel:

[Locke Cole]

Ooooh we have a tavern. I'll have to read up on this thread when I get some time.
*grabs charon and throws him back out the door* Thread? This isn't some sewing company, go back to where ye come from, foul demon! :nana:

[Mithrandir]

You mean it was Zima all along!? I have to tell Ming about this. Only he can help me in getting this Zima. He will pay for this oh yeas he will!!!

MWAHAHAHAHA!:evillaugh:

Oh and Silver, can I have your baby and train him as a warrior baby?

And barman I still haven'T received my glass of that. This is some service!:shame:

[Charon]

*picks himself up from outside and heads round the back door*
*sneaks in and sits down mumbling something about how cool it must be to have a forest out back*

[silverDistortioN]

Oh and Silver, can I have your baby and train him as a warrior baby?you... want to have my baby? ...sure.
*pours him a glass of zima then proceeds to have sex with him*

2gp please.

[TrueSephiroth]

Can you say awkward!

*Continues with his fight with Jetblue*

[silverDistortioN]

well, if you stopped staring, maybe it wouldn't be. =P

[Locke Cole]

Can you say awkward!

*Continues with his fight with Jetblue*
To the dungeon with ye both. *calls for the guards with flashy hats* :cop: :cop: :cop:

If you want to fight, you can enjoy doing so with the dragon downstairs. Oh, and have a nice day.

[jetblue]

(Aw man I guess I cant die easily so Ill do my best since my first story bottomed out and meet TrueSephiroths challenge)


Meanwhile in the dungeon.......


P.I. jetblue wakes in dungeon groggy and in pain.Face swollen from powerful hits.
Sees TrueSephiroth petting a purring dragon.
Stands up slowly limps toward him and says,
"Hey whats that on your face"punches a puzzled trueSephiroth in face
"Thats for giving me tonberry eyes"
"Dont you know there endangered!!!"
"And this is for hitting me when I said uncle"goes towards him to hit but then.....

[Zedie9]

:rofl: Wait... I need another drink! :drunk: This place is full of wackos fighting and having sex! And sometimes both! ;)

[FlashFirer]

*Celebration! We're gonna celebrate and have a good time come on now- Celebration!
Celebrate good times COMMON! We're gonna celebrate now!*
I love this music since I watched Muppets in NY :D

[Giea]

*Celebration! We're gonna celebrate and have a good time come on now- Celebration!
Celebrate good times COMMON! We're gonna celebrate now!*
I love this music since I watched Muppets in NY :D
*hits Flashfier over the head with a Spice Girl* Hey guys! I'm back from School Yay.. it Was Boring! Two Milkshakes please! =)

[TrueSephiroth]

*The dragon lurches at him*

*jetblue jumps back and avoids the retaliation*

It's a nice dragon and he gets upset easily I don't think we should fight in here with him he might decide to become angry.

Even I don't wanna mess with him cause I might have to kill him.

[Mithrandir]

Oh my god help me! I'm getting raped!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

When I said I wanted your baby I meant the one Yuffie is carrying!


*leaves the tavern and goes to seek counsel to Saruman*

[FlashFirer]

Spice Girls don't sing Celebration. ¬¬
*beats Giea to death with a random politician*
I want 3 milkshakes, and 2 hotdogs. Oh, and some lucozade, too, so Yuffie don't get pissed.

[silverDistortioN]

*brings everyone their food and drinks*

i'd say yes, Mith, but i'm planning on making some stew...

[Zedie9]

:wonder: *eyes the stew suspiciously*

I think I'll have an unopened Dr. Pepper, please. ;)

[Locke Cole]

My goodness, what is going on around here?

*collects the funds from the jar, pays the staff and then proceeds back into hiding*

[Giea]

*Finds Locke's hiding place* You coulda found a better place to hide, rather than putting a lampshade on your head... *Tags Locke* Your it!

[TrueSephiroth]

Lets go see if we can let you outta here buddy.

*Starts looking around the dungeon*

I don't see much but some dirt flooring and some brick pilllars for the tavern's supports.

I'm surprised you can live down here. Must be hard to find food.

[daniel]

*Makes his first Booya! *

100th reply:)

OR does this count as 101?

[Lord Draud]

mwa he ha ha ha more innocents for my experiments * starts stalking jet*:evilgrin:

[TheDragonKnight]

"ohh really? have i ever medtioned telekensis is your friend?"

TDK uses the aformentioned telekensis to steal a bottle

"hmm.. whats in here?"

[Kilu]

*Makes his first Booya! *

100th reply:)

OR does this count as 101?
It has always been the post count, not the reply count. And you can see the posts number on the upper right hand corner. So, you blew it, it was 101st post, not 100th :p AND...
please don't post useless replies such as '100th post!' etc. without posting something worthwhile. Try to contribute to the thread in some way.
MWAHAHA! Take him away boys :cop: :cop:

[daniel]

I did, i posted a question and this thread seems somewhat useless when you have ppl including geia playing tag and hide and seek with Locke Cole ha ha ha

[FlashFirer]

Giea playing tag with Locke?
Me wants to play too! :D
I typed this very slowly because I'm using school's poor keyboard.

[jetblue]

Meanwhile at the dungeon........



P.I.jetblue takes TrueSephiorths words to mind and says,
"I call a truce then. We will continue our duel once we get outta here. And no funny buisness o.k."
"I have an Idea. Ill go over to the dragon and take his energist and use it to fashion some type of......", jet blue is distracted by the trapdoor opening and a small man in a blood stained lab coat approches him with devilish eyes.
"Quickly! TrueSephiroth the trap door before it closes!!!!".....

[Lord Draud]

you peope are going to join me in my lab *sends forth 30 zombies to get them* MWA HE HA HA HA HA!* his flesh rots away and his true form if revealed as a LICH!

[silverDistortioN]

:wonder: *eyes the stew suspiciously*

I think I'll have an unopened Dr. Pepper, please. ;)what were you looking at? i didn't start the stew yet... in fact, i haven't even finished reading through the recipe.

*holds up a pamphlet before his eyes... "a modest proposal"*

oh yeah, here's your unopened dr. pepper...
*flings a dead surgeon over the counter*

[Locke Cole]

*Finds Locke's hiding place* You coulda found a better place to hide, rather than putting a lampshade on your head... *Tags Locke* Your it!
Thats funny, I don't remember putting that thing on my head. Ah well.

Kilu earns a bonus point for nailing someone not following the rules :p This thread may seem useless, but its just a place to come and be strange. Gaea may be playing tag with me, but atleast hes in character, and on topic... if you could call it that :o

[Kyari]

*. . . walks into the tavern . . .*

*. . . takes a seat in the corner near the stage . . .*

Do the brilliant chefs here know how to make pate a la rapure with a side of chicken frico? I haven't had any in a long time . . . my heritage on my mother's side is Acadian, and boy, they know their food!

[Giea]

Thats funny, I don't remember putting that thing on my head. Ah well.

Kilu earns a bonus point for nailing someone not following the rules :p This thread may seem useless, but its just a place to come and be strange. Gaea may be playing tag with me, but atleast hes in character, and on topic... if you could call it that :oGaea... thats sounds like a relative... *takes out family tree* Hiea.. Liea...Tiea... nope no Gaea

[silverDistortioN]

oui! pate a la rapure et frico au poulet! il m'incite à vouloir à l'orgasme!
................... >.>

i don't have all the ingedients prepared, so it'll take a little while...
here is a shotgun to play with while you wait! ^.^
*hands him the gun*

[Kyari]

oui! pate a la rapure et frico au poulet! il m'incite à vouloir à l'orgasme!

Okay, you've got to stop doing that :D . I'm at work (out of character! ba dum!), and you make me look insane when I read posts like that and immediately burst into loud laughter . . . they think I'm loco :wacky: . It's especially bad since I work in a tech support centre (sir? What's so funny . . . sir?)

Wheeee! A shotgun!

[TrueSephiroth]

*jumps up and wedges sword in the door so it won't close all the way*

Well you wanna go first or should I?

[jetblue]

P.I. jetblue dodges the zombies and distracts Lord Draud by throwing the contents of his pockets at him.
"Ill go first and keep it open in case there's anyone unsavory on the outside"
P.I.jetblue opens trap door all the way and looks around of tavern.Sees some dancing,no one notices him yet.
"Come on True Sephiroth its clear!! Hurry before that LICH gains his sences."
" Ill put that heavy vending machine on top of the trap door as soon as you clear. By the way,you had a sword all this time?".......

[Zedie9]

*sings a bardly song about taverns and ale, and zombies coming to kidnap Silver*

[Yuffie]

You mean I've still got that thing?! :amazed:

Wow...thought I sold that on ebay 2 months ago...

Well I'm making the most of it then. Silver, I'm going on maternity leave so you can do all the work! :D
*throws herself into a chair*

BARMAN!!! Get me a lucozade NOW! :cheers:

[TrueSephiroth]

*Looks at him with a blank stare while getting out of the trap door*

Do you really think I wouldn't have my Masamune with me at all times?!

You aren't dead right now because I didn't use it. I like a bit of a challenge so I used my fists and level one magic.
I still wanna get that dragon outta there.

*hears the dragon*
I know I know I'll get you out soon enough. You've waited this long whatsa few more minutes to ya?

So you wanna continue our bought?

(just a thought, this is a fun battle going on because it doesn't involve my clothing getting soiled like what happened with doomtrain consistenly)

[silverDistortioN]

You mean I've still got that thing?! :amazed:

Wow...thought I sold that on ebay 2 months ago...

Well I'm making the most of it then. Silver, I'm going on maternity leave so you can do all the work! :D
*throws herself into a chair*

BARMAN!!! Get me a lucozade NOW! :cheers:i don't think ebay lets you sell fetuses... cuz i sure as hell can't find any.

and... just to refresh your memory... you never worked here! =P

but here's you're lucozade! ^.^
*slides a bottle down the counter all cool-like*

[jetblue]

P.I.jetblue grabs a bottle thats sliding down the bar.
"What?!? You want to get that dragon out? It doesnt fly,Its a land dragon there worthless",takes a sip from bottle and spits it out,
"Ugh...to sweet & too weak. Alright Ill help you get that dragon out but how are we going to contend with those zombies and lord draud. My pockets are empty and someone took my gun when I was thrown down there", starts to slide vending machine off trap door.
"But remember when were done Im going to get even for this ",points to blackeye and cut lip,"And you messed up my suit. Its a original 1940s suit. Where am I going to find 60 year old polyester?".........

[silverDistortioN]

bitch. that wasn't yours. *shoots him in the face*

[Mithrandir]

okay so follow this drinking song!

Oh the night that Pat Murphy died, is a night I'll never forget.
Some of the boys got loaded drunk and they ain't got sober yet.


*dances as he sings*

[Lord Draud]

i have some 60 year old polyester in my closet its a bit dusty but its there i got it for my chair but then i remembered that i don't need to stand, and get back to work you flesh bag i want out and your holding me up AND STOP LEAVING YOUR SKIN ON MY RUG!!!

[silverDistortioN]

oooh... polyester from before polyester was even invented. o.o

[Zedie9]

bitch. that wasn't yours. *shoots him in the face*
:D Ah! So perhaps you were the one who stole Jetblue's gun, making the shooting somewhat ironic. ;) Or... was shooting him in the face you finally making stew? :evilgrin:

[TrueSephiroth]

He's fine I cast shield on him in the darkness when the dragon tryed to get him.

*casts shield on him again*

There you go little protection for you.
Lets go. And leave the door open.

*Jumps down*

Little dark in here.

*casts fire spell and doesn't release it*
*starts looking for the madman and his zombies with glowing fireball in hand*

[Yuffie]

Going back to the whole baby thing. I once heard about a guy on the radio who sold his virginity on ebay to fund his university fees. :rofl:

Went for £9000. Ulp. :(

[silverDistortioN]

actually, that was a girl...

[Yuffie]

If a girl sounds like that then how the hell did she get £9000? :amazed:

Wonder if the person put on a picture. :p

[jetblue]

(I cant think straight because Im laughing over here. I cant belive you saved me. I thought that was the end and that there would be no creative way to save or ressurect me. Well done TrueSephiroth.)



P.I.jetblue stares in shock as a bullet fired from his pistol stops in mid air 5 inches from his face,plucks it from air and throws at floor. Jumps over bar and snatches pistol from hand of waiter and says,
"No one shoots at P.I.jetblue. Especially with his own gun. Your lucky,very lucky I dont complain!!! Now make me a double pizza burger with curly fries and remember Im a P.I.not a cop. I will eat it when I get back",
jumps back over bar and goes with True Sephiroth.
"I didnt know you had so many talents TrueSephiroth." stands by trap door and checks how manny rounds are left.
"I threw my extra bullets at LordDraud down there along with my wallet,change,condoms,hotwheel,fountain pen,notepad,ciggarette case,half a package of m&m's,and my lighter. Good thing you got that fireball."
starts down trapdoor,amazed at fireball on TrueSephiroths hand.
"Oh before we leave do you want me to order you a double pizza burger with curlyfries?"........

[silverDistortioN]

you never paid for the lucozade, so i don't see much point in making a double cheeseburger with some curly fries......... other than to eat it myself cuz that's sounding kinda good right about now.

If a girl sounds like that then how the hell did she get £9000? :amazed:you mean you heard the guy who sold his virginity talking about it?

...just checked up on it... yeah, you're right. there was another case with a lesbian, tho. she ended up with twice as much.

...but neither of them were all too hot. =)

[Giea]

Silver really didnt tell you.. he was the first person to sell his virginity on ebay... went for 12$... too bad he was only 12

[jetblue]

P.I.jetblue sticks head out of trapdoor and says,
"Ill pay you when I get my wallet back from Lord Draud or one of the zombies. I cant find it on the floor."
goes back under...then comes back up,
"Men dont have virginitys. Unless you count...er....but thats disgusting. And if he says he never slept with a woman he's lying. I heard of a geisha in japan that was 17 and they had a auction for her and it ended in almost $100,000 dollars I think or more.Ill check on it when Im done. And the winner had her checked for authenticity wich I think is a joke. She could still do it."
see's bottle fly in his direction and goes under again....

[Mithrandir]

Anyway, here Yuffie, let me pay you a drink (read Lucozade).

*claps twice*
Waiter! Bring me a bottle of your best lucozade. And on the double!

[FlashFirer]

I'm hungry. '_'
Bring me, like, 300 super hamburgers with lucozade on 'em.

[silverDistortioN]

*does as he's told with a forced smile pasted on his face...*

[FlashFirer]

*eats*
Huh... What?

[Grim]

okay so follow this drinking song!

Oh the night that Pat Murphy died, is a night I'll never forget.
Some of the boys got loaded drunk and they ain't got sober yet.


*dances as he sings*Good Ol' Great Big Sea :)

"Stabs the Waiter and puts Giea in charge*

[silverDistortioN]

*pulls the knife out of his chest and separates Grim's head from his body, flushing it down the toilet*

Giea may help, but Locke's the one who hires new people. =P
and no stabbing the waiter from now on, please. =)
thank you for your consideration.

[TrueSephiroth]

(That is the main reason why I saved you. Dodging would be too matix like and overdone and I sureas hell wasn't going to get in the way of it. They are conspiring to stop our story from unfolding, this is fun A little slice of D.A.D.)

I saved you because we have something to finish. And yes this fireball is cool.
Why else do you think I would use it instead of this flashlight.:D

*hands JetBlue a flashlight*

Well theres our friend the dragon. Did you miss me?

*Dragon belches*
I guess he didn't have time while he was eating something. I wonder what?

[FlashFirer]

Maybe no one needs to know what.

[jetblue]

Meanwhile in dungeon.......


"Thanks for that flashlight.Where did everyoone go? Wheres Lord Draud?"
looks around with flash light.looks on floor for stuff.
"I cant belive this! All the stuff that was in my pockets is gone!"
"Do you think the dragon ate whoever has my stuff."
P.I. jetblue inspects docile dragon.
"This dragon doesnt have a energist?!? What kind of dragon is this? And whats that vent for that seems to go up to the tavern?"
P.I.jetblue hears water drip echo down cave.
"It seems this cave has tunnels. Mabey we can lead the dragon out that way"
"Should we explore?"........

[Giea]

*Hmph* Fine! I'll be the Bartender and employ myself =P... Whats that Yuffie you want some Lucozade?? *points chemical X in the Lucozade* here.. all nice and yummy! =)

[TrueSephiroth]

Yes lets go.

Common lets get you outta this nasty old place.

Should we name it?

[Lord Draud]

hmmm looks at the stuff from the guys wallet...... starts makeing a hand gun and booby traps .......takes out his A team hand book of making stuff....after 12 hours raises another 120 zombies to roam the halls

[jetblue]

Meanwhile in dungeon........




"How about D-Rex? Since I dont know what type of dragon it is. The dragons from Fanelia are much bigger."
P.I.jetblue looks around dragon towards the back.
"Its a male. Do you think?....Do you think he will let us ride him?"
TrueSephiroth looks at him with a raised eyebrow.
"I mean those tunnels look long and........Nevermind."
"Do you have a better name?"
P.I.jetblue and TrueSephiroth start to coax dragon foward into tunnel when......

[TrueSephiroth]

I'm not very creative in this department.

I pass on this turn.

[silverDistortioN]

psst... name him Dante. Dante is a cool name for a dragon, i think.

[jetblue]

"Then D-rex it is."
P.I.jetblue makes cute noises at dragon and call it by name as if its a cat .
"You do realize that the only reason this dragon is so freindly is because it hasnt absorbed sunlight in a very long time and is very weak."
pushes and tugs at dragon to make it move faster down tunnel.
"Once it tastes sunlight theres a good chance it will grow bigger and turn on us"
P.I.jetblue stops at end of tunnel in amazement.
"Such a big cavern. I had no Idea It was this big. And so manny tunnels."
"Wich way should we go. Unless we look for someone that Knows the layout of these tunnels we could roam for days. Mabey thats how ol D-Rex ended up down here fo so long.".....

[Zedie9]

Mabey thats how ol D-Rex ended up down here fo so long.".....
:D Perhaps D-Rex was down there nesting or mating...? Of course, that might mean there is at least one other dragon down there... :evilgrin:

[TrueSephiroth]

I don't know.

I would venture a guess that there is no one down here besides us and Draud.

I just want the dragon to be happier, I'm sure him going around terrorizing people would make him happier then beeing cooped up in this dungeon.

I know I have fun terrorizing people.

[Lord Draud]

bah that dragon is useless i tryed making him a deal that if he served me i would give him wealth and power but he went to sleep i keep sending zombies to kill him but they never come back....

[Yuffie]

Wow...you guys have really accepted my lucozade as if it were your own...thanks guys I'm so moved! :bawl:

[jetblue]

Meanwhile in dungeon........



P.I.jetblue and TrueSephiroth coxing dragon down tunnle,
"I agree. Dragons arent really alive unless there terrorizing some town to a point where they send virgins for sacrifice. Dragons got it good."
stops pushing to wipe brow,
"Oh I forgot to mention that the D in D-rex doesnt stand for dragon. It stands for Dante. I heard this....voice...voice in my mind something like telepathy say to name it Dante Rex or D-rex."scratches head,
"But anyway do you think there might be another one around because of the nest of bones and food wrappers this one was laying on? Dragons dont make nests unless for there mates."
"Or do males lay eggs when no female is around. Blast I cant remember my Dragon biology from High School. I flunked that class."leans over to look at something in distance.
"Mabey the tavern was breeding dragons for there Henfruit (40's slang for egg) for there ceaser salads."
puzzled jetblue leaves dragons side.
"Is that....Is that a pie on the floor over there? What would a pie be doing in the middle of a cavern?"jetblue walks closer
"It looks more like a cheesecake with strawberry topping. Lets go get it Im starved!!!"jetblue tugs at TrueSephiroths finely woven cloak when.....

[Giea]

Hey! Silver, wasn't I suppose to have my cheesecake by now? And also, isn't there a rule here... If I don't get my food in 20 minutes or less, don't I get it free??

[TrueSephiroth]

Smack!

Don't touch the threads.

*Jet's hand glows red for a few minutes*

It can't be a cheese cake not down here. Go after it if you want but don't expect me to save you from your stupidity.

[TheDragonKnight]

TDK teleports next to the dragon "hey leave my damn dragon alone shes over 40,000 years old let her nap dammit"

TDK turns to the dragon "go back to sleep ragauth"

TDK glares at the two adventueres "i am valheru, were called dragon lords for a reason, ITS MY BLOODY DRAGON! and she speaks standard if you bothered to ask"

[Lord Draud]

hmmm where in the hell are those two fools going with that dragon and why is that valheru always poping in? and where in the hell in my cheese cake! zombie minions go forth and find out all the answers and if you have a moment kill the intuders

[jetblue]

"Owwe....that smarts!"
P.I.jetblue yelps in pain while holding hand,
"You think its a booby trap? Lend me your sword so I can nudge it to see if it releases something,yeah?"suddenly TDK appears and trys to claim dragon,
"So your the one responsible for keeping this dragon here. And I dont care if that dragons your slave because I am a draconian from Fanelia,a kingdom of Gaea,where we dont treat dragons like this."scratches head,
"Uh..well Im only related to a draconian on my grandmothers side and technically I was born on earth...but I own a fishing cabin in fanelia!!!!"
"Anyway we wont let you imprison this dragon any longer!!!",takes out pistol,
"TrueSephiroth to arms!!!!"
P.I.jetblue charges TDK then........

[Giea]

*turns into Boy Fairy* HEY!! Thats my Cheese Cake!! *Fires Plasma Beams at Draud*

[Zedie9]

I just want the dragon to be happier, I'm sure him going around terrorizing people would make him happier then beeing cooped up in this dungeon.

I know I have fun terrorizing people.:D Perhaps the dragon would be happier if you fed Yuffie to it...? :evilgrin:

:wonder: Then again, she might give it indigestion. ;) :rofl:

[Yuffie]

You can bet your life I'd give it indigestion! I wouldn't have it any other way! :evilgrin:

[Lord Draud]

OW! do you know how much that burns? do you? well lets see .......hmm yes *opens a gate to the elemental plan of fire under Gieas feet and uses a ring of the ram to force him down* bye bye annoying mortal

[TheDragonKnight]

TDK holds up a hand halting the charging adventurer in mid stride "first i dont enslave hre she serves willingly, and your disurbing her nap shes only had 3 centuries so far, second i dont care where your from this is a midkeimian great wyrm, and as i said sentient, why dont you try asking her if you dont beleive me?"

TDK looks down t the weapon in disgust "besides you'll need something signifiantly more powerfull than that if you expect to harm me with a physical weapon" TSK glances over towards TrueSephiroth "now theres a weapon with some real power you might be able to scradch my armour with that one, now would you PLEASE let the dragon go back to sleep ifshe doesnt get her full 500 yeas shell be grumpy for the next 2 thousand years!"

[TrueSephiroth]

Blue do you know where the hell these guys came from?:search:

[Giea]

Blue do you know where the hell these guys came from?:search:Isn't that a question you should ask your mom or dad? =P

[jetblue]

P.I.jetblue,weary from his first bout with TDK kneals at TrueSephiroth's side,
"Theres to many of them! Who would of thought this cave would be as busy as the tavern up there."reloads his gun,
"I disoriented TDK for a bit by shooting him in his pinky toe. He has armour all over but I guess he was wearing his sandels at home for comfort when he appeared here and forgot to put his armour boots on when he left his house. Its happened to me before."wipes sweat from brow,
"And that fairy really freaked me out. I never seen a naked one before. I thought they were all suppose to be female. And it took my cheesecake."
P.I.jetblue stands up and looks at ceiling,
"I have a Idea! Our only way out of this meele is to jump on this dragons back ,trample those zombies,and you make a HUGE fireball and collapse the cave behind us, burying our enemies. Its our only chance!"
P.I.jetblue and TrueSephiroth jump on dragons back and charge down cave trampling all that stand in there way and.......

[Zedie9]

[Come on guys - Seph and Jetblue were having an adventure in character, so don't harass them so much, unless you do it in character as well. :p ]

[Giea]

[Come on guys - Seph and Jetblue were having an adventure in character, so don't harass them so much, unless you do it in character as well. :p ][I guess your not helping much? :music: ]

[Yuffie]

OH NO!!! Look there's a giant purple alien that looks like a wheelie bin flying through the window!!!! :amazed:

What on earth will happen now?! :amazed:

Hehehe... :evilgrin:

[TheDragonKnight]

heh i am harrassing them IC that really IS my dragon down therei was talking to locke one day abotu the monster under the duengon and we decdied it would be my dragon :P

[Lord Draud]

and i am sending teams of Zombies afer them but i am thinking i realy should up grade to ....hmm ghould and shadow ag yes....* starts pumping out strength stealing shadows ( for game note they can only be hit by magic weaopns and only 50% of the time unless you can hit non corporeeal things)

[Zedie9]

[I guess your not helping much? :music: ]
[:D No, I wasn't originally, but I immediately took the hint from Sephiroth's post, whereas you jackalopes continued for several posts. :p I thought I'd give a nudge. ;) ]

[Giea]

[dumm dumm dumm!! Zedie teh Party Pooper to save teh day!!] Hey!! You guys in the Dungeon!! There Will Be NO! Trying to Leave!! *shoots tranquliser bullets to make ever1 fall asleep* Heya! And thats my dragon *mumbles under breath* *starts to ride the dragon and flies off to South Korea* See you next fall!

[Lord Draud]

um i have no blood or skin so your tarbks can't stop me mwa he ha ha ha ha so i head up to get a pint.....of blood!

[FlashFirer]

Now I got this Power Rangers theme song in my head.
"Go Go Power Rangers dum dum dum dum du duum Go Go Power Rangers Dam Dam Dam Dam Da Dam Go Go Power Rangers Mighty Morphin Power Rangers"
Oh well.

[Mithrandir]

Consider yourself luck, that is way better than having the newest Celine Dion song in your head....:knockedout:

[TheDragonKnight]

i would try to reply with something meaningfull and intelligent but i no longer have any idea whats going on.

[Lord Draud]

meaningfull, intelligent and chocked with so many typos we ignore it cause we can't read it you mean

[FlashFirer]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA.
...What?
:spam:

[Zedie9]

:wonder: If Silver is leaving, who's going to be the bartender? ... I suggest all applicants fight it out! :evilgrin:

[Lord Draud]

i will do the job grin, i will serve drink and such but piss me off and i will fireball you!

[jetblue]

While everyone in the bar is deep in conversation,the trapdoor opens with a loud bang,P.I.jetblue emerges all dirty and his once fine tailored suit reduced to barely a loin cloth and say's,
"What the hell are you all looking at. I have been down there for days digging myself out of that cave in. Didnt anyone hear my cries for help?",limps towards bar and drinks from someones glass,
"Does any know where TrueSephiroth is?You know the guy that looks like Allen Schezar. But with white hair. Any one?"see'e empty stares,
" Last I saw of him was when we were riding that dragon when the cave in happened and I fell off and got buried alive. Chances are he made it. But for me I waited days thinking he would dig me out.",goes toward bar napkin and writes down mysterious message,
"If he comes around give him this message",slams napkin on bar, limps towards door,
"I am outta here. But Ill be back! And watch out cause Ill have a better suit on!",opens the 2 tavern doors and leaves without closing them mumbling to himself.

[TrueSephiroth]

*Looks up from newspaper*

I thought you just left dude. I figured if you wanted to do something you would find me.

The dragon is outside having fun go see how hes doing.

But I think you should get a bath first. He's probably run from you with that stench.

[Lord Draud]

8 sends his zombie to give out drinks* ah the fun of having slave labour

[jetblue]

P.I.jetblue looks for his car outside in front of the tavern. He hears a familiar voice coming from the castiron cafe tables and chairs near the taverns side
See's TrueSephiroth reading a newspaper. On his table a bottle of sake and a plate with a half eaten riceball.
Limps towards his table and says'
"Why the hell did'nt you come back for me!?"
jetblue extends his arm to grab sake cup but TrueSephiroth grabs first and takes a sip,hears gunfire and screaming in the distance,
"Sounds like the dragons having fun."
reaches for riceball but TrueSephiroth grabs with chopstics and eats it,
"Yeah I need a bath and a change of clothes. Im exahusted. As soon as I find my car Ill..."looks around see's nothing,
"Oh great!!!!! Some one took my car! Someone must have found my keys in the cavern floor. My 1949 mercury coupe gone!!!"a military jeep speeds by firing its machine gun with the dragon chaseing it.
"Hell Im gonna have to walk home like this. At least the cops are busy"
"Ill see ya in a while TrueSephiroth....Unless you have a car and possib..."
P.I.jetblue looks around and there are no other vehicals around.
"Nevermind. Ill be back in a while",jetblue starts to walk down street. Hears thunder and a gentle rain starts to pour. Looks back to see if TrueSephiroth Is getting wet but see's he's protected by the cafe's table umbrella.
Continues walking down street hugging himself for warmth and mumbling curse words.

[Lord Draud]

* sends a zombie with a 1920's styl suit after jet with a not * you owe me one .Draud

[jetblue]

2 blocks away from the tavern P.I.jetblue hears moanig behind him.
Turns to see zombie with parcel in arms. Takes parcel flicks off maggot and reads note.
"I see. Well at least I wont catch Pneumonia from the rain"
Puts on suit. Abit tight on waist.
"Aw man a suit from the roaring twentys. I hate that era. To many mobsters."
jetblue continues walking. Notices zombie standing there. Goes back to zombie and say's with a loud voice,
"Zombie go back to master,tell I say thank you."
The zombie flails his arms and yells"AHRGGGGGGGGGGGGG" and walks back towards tavern.
"And zombie take down all the cafe table umbrellas" hears moan from zombie.
P.I.jetblue continues walking when he hears a military helicopter pass over head and fires a full barage of missiles. The missles hit there target throwing smoke and debris everywhere. See's dragon leap in the air and bite off helicopters rotor. Helicopter spins wildly then crashes in distance.
jetblue continues walking singing to himself,
"desert wind....cool your aching head. The weight of the world drift away instead. HOhhhhhhhoh these days I nearly get by......I dont even try"

[Yuffie]

WHO PUT THESE ZOMBIES IN HERE?!!? IT'S NOT HYGIENIC!!!!!!!!!!!

*sprays disinfectant and air freshener over the zombie*

Get into the storeroom and sit still until I can gather the rest of you and send you to a special disinfectant tank!!!!!! :amazed:

[Lord Draud]

what is this who put my waiters in this storeroom GO BACK TO WORK And DON"T STOP TILL I SAY SO!

[Ality]

Chef = service? sweet!
Double Pepperoni and a Sobe for me

/em sticks 7 gp in the CD rom drive.

[Yuffie]

*shoves Draud into the stockroom*

YOU'RE CONTAMINATED!!!!!!!! AAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

*puts on a huge protective suit and dunks him in a vat of disinfectant*

Feel better? :D

[Lord Draud]

i feel......i could have done that with a cleaning spellbah now i am all smelly like lemons, give a zobie Alitys food and sends him of to his table

[FlashFirer]

*Kicks everybody*
Quite easy.....my job!

[jetblue]

Meanwhile in the big city at P.I.jetblues basement office/apartment.......





P.I.jetblue wakes from the couch,stretches and thinks,
*I needed that rest after all that crazyness at that taven*
walks to desk to plug in perculator,
*most of the bruises I got from TrueSephiroth have healed*
*I could've beaten him. And those zombies and that guy in the armour*
walks to front door to get newspaper sticking out of mail slot,
*Im never going back there. Not even to look for my car.*
sits at desk,pours a cup of coffe and opens newspaper,
"Headlines:MYSTERY LIZARD STILL TERRORIZING LOCAL TOWN pg.2
U.S.Army unable to destroy mystery lizard. Has thrown everything they have at it leveling most of the town in the attempt.
Exept for a small tavern and a green temple. Despite evacuation and blockade seems to be quite busy with customers.
The Armys latest attempt,to feed the lizard a cow covered in sleeping pills has failed. The Army has no choice but to use there most powerfulest weapon. THE ATOM BOMB. A b-52 is on its way from Edwards in sunny Calif."
*What!!! They got to be crazy! Its just a dragon jeez. I got to warn them*
starts to get dressed
*Edwards is pretty far. Wont get here for a while*
Grabs hat,coat and satchel and runs out the door.........

[Ality]

at least it's not my spleen they'll be snacking on tonight ;).

[TrueSephiroth]

Huh?

Not your spleen?

I prefer a story not involved with blowing us up. We'll probably just choose to ignore this plot twist.

[Zedie9]

:D Bartender! Give me ale! Whale ale! No - pale whale ale, on the rocks! :lick:

[Lord Draud]

*sends a zombie with a ale to zedies table* an atomic bomb eh? not like i have to worry but just incase it reacts with me magical laboritory i will cast a wall of force over the bar, " ok every one the bar is safe for the next few hours but i am afraid you can't leave till then......unless you can teleport or travel to another plane of existence, till then pleaze sit back and relax "

[jetblue]

(No one is gonna blow up. Its all I could think of to get me back to the tavern.I saw something similiar on sci-fi on saturday. That movie with the transdimensional beings. Cant remember the name. Im just writing whatever I can think up and stay in charechter(1940s)at the same time. Do you know how weak atom bombs were back then. At least 30 kilotons. Im sure TrueSephiroth's ultima spell is way more powerful. Now play along:))




P.I.jetblue bursts through the tavern doors huffing and puffing from running through a military blockade,Is about to yell for everyone to flee but hesitates. He sees TrueSephiroth by the juke box. If I can get him to move the dragon away from the area mabey that will save everyone.
Goes to sit at bar asks the bartender LordDraud,
"Let me get a cup of java and a double cheese burger. No onions."
opens up a pack of lucky strikes,
"Hey LordDraud what happened to the guy with the cute..Er..I mean strange ears that was bartending? Did the dragon eat him?"
lights and puffs a cigarette,

[TrueSephiroth]

YEEHAA! Lets start postin!

Interesting way to come up with a tory plot Jetblue.

[Lord Draud]

i am afraid i do not know what your talking about i just ook over due to the short livedness of mortals or so i think my wall of froce is taking a bit out of me oh and here is your meal

[jetblue]

P.I jetblue pays with a saw buck,
"Keep the change",puts cigarette down and takes a bite of his burger.
"Hey...Wait a minute...this tastes like a double stack from Wendys",takes another bite and makes a yum sound.
"This is good,let me get another burger and some chicken nuggets if you got em",continues eating and puts another sawbuck on the bar.
Waves over to TrueSephiroth,
"How ya doing there TrueSephiroth",takes a big bite from his burger,"Let me buy ya a drink",
"Its weird how the bar was full of people a minute ago,now its us 3. Must of been some type of space time dimensional rift wormhole or something and my watch calendar has seemed to have jumped forwrd a month or so."continues eating cheeseburger,"Weird huh?"

[Lord Draud]

i am not efected by time-space-warp-technobable stuff like the rest of you mortals all i remember but it was a slow day so i sat down to watch some Dragon ball then Dragon ball z then DB-GT, as for the burger i'll have you know your eating 100% old zombie parts not wendys.....unless one of my zombies was named wendy

[jetblue]

"I see. Your a non-corporial being. That explains why the suit you lent me was from the 1920's and monogrammed LD. I have it in my satchel bag",opens satchel bag and takes out clean and pressed tuxedo suit."I thought you might want it back since its pure silk",hands it to Lord Draud.
Takes another huge bite from burger and hears Lord Draud"s explanation on the recipe then slows down chewing....then chews faster....then smells burger....chews slower....stops and says,"Zombie parts eh....better give me more ketchup then",continues eating.
Looks toward TrueSephiroths direction,"Hey what kind of drink will you have? Sake?...Whiskey?...Beer? I would offer you a burger but uh....Im kinda not sure whats in them but there the best burger Ive had in a long time"....

[Lord Draud]

i am very solid indeed but i am cronologicly impaired time has to efect on me, if you want another burger i can get you one * turns to the grill and orders one of the paddys to flip and it twichs to life fliping over*

[Yuffie]

I NEED LUCOZADE!!! I've been so deprived of it!!!!

*grabs some lucozade and rocks in a corner*

[Giea]

I'll fight you for the last Lucozade!! ^.^ And your dentures! wohoo

[TrueSephiroth]

Nah I don't want anything.
Should you really be serving up the undead in this joint I'm not sure who would be happy about that.

*My friend shall be visiting soon from the real world he acts strange and is strange. He's been wanting to get into these forums since guess when? As soon as he wanted in the forums went down. Lots of strange coincidences occur around him so you should watch what you say to him.*

[FlashFirer]

*somebody enters*
-Are you his friend? o.o (FlashFirer was sleepy so he slept for 3 months, but now he's back)
*gets punched*
-I must give up all my alchoolic lucozade...who wants it? :P

[Lord Draud]

i will buy it for the back room and as for severing up the undead its only the pasrt that i can find crawling on the floor that i use in my food

[jetblue]

"Nothing to drink?.....Then how about to eat?",pushes half eaten burger to the side because of what Lord Draud said,"I dont recomend the burger after seeing that patty flip on its own",picks up menue and reads.
"Hey Lord Draud let me get the Texas style Ribs...Make sure there drowning in sauce",puts another sawbuck on the bar.
"I think the Ribs are safe TrueSephiroth....Want a Plate?",motions to Lord Draud for 2 orders."Hows D-rex doing? Can you see him through the window?"tries to look over TrueSephiroths shoulder to look out window.
"Im surprised that D-Rex has'nt attacked the people now filling the bar."
Looks around and see's a toots(40's slang for girl) in the corner hugging a bottle of Lucozade."Hey Lord Draud let me get a bottle of what shes drinking and send her another on me",puts yet another sawbuck on the bar.
"When Im done eating TrueSephiroth Im going outside to see D-Rex. I hope he's okay. Its preety quiet outside. I dont even hear the military out there.".....





*Your freind will be joining? Good.We need more strange people like me on the forum*

[Lord Draud]

ok then two plates of ribs coming up * yels out for a rib cage to get on the grill and a human ribcage rolls on to the grill and splits in half to start cooking* and two bottle of the stuff coming right up * turns to his zombies slaves and orders then to get the drinks and severt he ribs when they are done*, well it could be that the dagon killed all the poor grunts hey i think those ribs where from a texan after all your in luck!

[Ksaa]

After ordering a plate of food, and waiting quite a while, a Zombie slinks up to Ksaa and hands the plate over. "Thanks..." yet the Zombie would not leave, but instead kept staring. "Yo... gotta problem?"
"Uhhhhh.. food..."
"Thats it... I hate undead..." Almost instantly Ksaa's clothing phased over, and he was suddenly in a white robe with a white zigzag,a d a hood. Speaking yet a simple word, "Cure," the zombie fell to dust. "Yo!! TrueSephiroth!!"

(hehe!! i'm in!! alllll done making the account! give me a while to get back into RPing... it's been MONTHS since my most active board died! hehe! lessee who can tell what kinda char i am?? LOL
~Geo)

[jetblue]

P.I.jetblue holds his mouth in disgust as he see's the ribs cook themselves.
Turns to Lord Draud and say's,"Oh come on Lord Draud !!!"
"Why does everything have to be dead human parts? You gotta have some zombie cows back there."takes his saw buck from the table.
"I aint paying for that. Look,next time I order something dont tell me what its made from and for gods sake close the kitchen door so I dont loose my appetite. O.K."drinks his Lucozade,
"Now what kind of pies do you have here?"
jetblue is startled by the appearence of a strange figure in a white robe.
"Well howdy there. Im P.I.jetblue from metroplex city. Can I offer you a drink?".....




*Seriously. Hi Ksaa and welcome to the greatest site on the web.*

[Ksaa]

"Hewwo.. sure.. but not something heavy.. no telling what happens when i lose control." Ksaa stood to meet the new person, Jetblue, and suddenly his clothes phased again, but this time into a blue robe, with a zigzag at bottom.

[TrueSephiroth]

It has been some time now has it not Ksaa?

This is my good friend from my realm Ksaa. He has his own language system so until he actually says it even I don't always know what it means.

The inconsistencies in the food supply are exactly why I had this vending machine installed. Ya'll do remember the vending machine right?

*walks up to vending machine and gets a sandwhich and a Dr. Pepper then sits down at a table with Ksaa*

Well what you want to do now between you, me, and jetblue we could do something besides sit and eat?

Let me eat before we go and do anything. *starts eating*

[Giea]

*sprints into the room* guys! guys! Listen Up! This Jig is gonna blow up if you like it or not in one minute! P.I. Jetblue! We need your help!

[Ksaa]

"I'm goodies, TrueSephiroth," He went to Vending Machine, and dug in his pockets, searching for some coin, after a minute he pulled some out, and got a rootbeer and some BBQ chips. after opening the bag, his ears perked up at the 'this place is gunna blow' and turned around, "errr... 'cuse mie? dis place gunna blow?"

[jetblue]

P.I.jetblue yells out,
"Where not going to blow up.(unless giea is talking about another pending disaster)It would of happened already. That transdimensional time warp rift wormhole did something to us that Im not entirely sure what only that my watch is ahead exactly 1 month. And that most of the people in the bar have dissapeared.",stomach makes a rumbling sound."Sorry about that.I think that burger is creeping up in me."
"Hey TrueSephiroth did you put a spell on this place and.......Wait a minute none of you knew about the approacing bomb thats why I came here to warn you",looks puzzled,
"Hey Lord Draud let me get a bi-carbonate of soda,my stomach is rumbling fierce."throws two bits on the bar.
"We all need to go find that dragon and see whats going on outside".....



*you guys add more story elements and I will follow,unless Giea meant another explosion.*

40's slang:
bi-carbonate/antacid
two bits/.25 cent coin

[Giea]

"Woops! Very sorry.. the other place down the street is gonna blow(giggles) *cough* Hmm.. Personally I thought there was a murder here.. about 2 years ago..*inducts a story* This place was almost out of buisness.. and a pretty lady.. named Yaffie.. wanted just a simple Milkshake.. but thats not what she was gonna get.. three robbers entered the place.. and the only name I could catch was.. Kalu..she was shot dead.. and the place was robbed.. a horror.. but I see this place is up and running.. good good... <ahem> very sorry.. but the names G.Goba ;-)

[Lord Draud]

alright then i have lemon merang and pecan pie at the moment what you want * turns to zombie slaves and get off with there drinks and orders* a cow zombie eh? hmmmm be right back *goes into the back and there is a bright flash and zaping sound followed by a MOO! and a large fleashy object hiting the floor* ok you can cow ribs? i got lots s for the burger creeping up on you that might be more literal then you want to admit drink some of this * hands jet a bottle labeld HOLY WATER 100% proof*

[jetblue]

"Merangue and pecan eh.",looks at Lord Draud suspiciously,"Not undead merangue or zombie pecans?....Nevermind I dont want to know. Let me get a slice of pecan and a demetasse."goes into suit pocket and takes out some bills and a pack of lucky strikes. See's Lord Draud go into kitchen and produce a cow. Looks at him with unease."Did you transmorph a human zombie into a cow?",lights up a cigarrette.
"Forget it. Ill pass on the ribs for now."looks toward the others,"Hey TrueSephiroth,Ksaa,Giea want to go 4 way splits on a large pizza?"walks towards payphone. Looks at phonebook.........





Demetasse/40's term used for expresso type coffe

[Lord Draud]

sight you wanted cow so i got a cow its already read and every thing i have a spell cast on it to perserve the body and then i animated it so you could see its not a human this is how you treat me? bah its your choose but since the nearest pizza place is the next town over due to rampaging dragon and what not i sujest yu sit and eat, its not like tis gonna go cold of anything but do you have anyidea how useless a zombie COW IS!

[jetblue]

"Whats the big deal? Now you have zombie cow milk for your cornflakes. I mean the cornflakes are already dead corn. Right?"continues puffing cigarette.
looks at TrueSephiroth and Ksaa eat there vending machine food and thinks,I unplugged that vending machine for a few hours when I was using it to baracade the trap door a while back so I dont think the mayo on those sandwiches is fresh. They might get a tummy ache.
"Alright Lord Draud. Let me get a order of ribs then. And Im sorry for making you go through all this trouble.Ill give you a extra tip."puts phone book on bar and sits down.Takes out pack of cigarettes and lights up another.
"Hey Lord Draud want a smoke?"holds out pack...........

[Lord Draud]

shure it smoking is an old way of perserving meat * lights up* one order of ribs coming up

[jetblue]

"And please put lots of BBQsauce on them",see's Lord Draud go to the kithen and hears a cleaver hitting bone.
"Hey Geia,TrueSephiroth,Ksaa, any of you guys want a cigarette?",walks towards them with pack but realizes hes out.
"Blast. Im out. Ill get some more from that cigarette machine in the back",walk's toward machine and digs in his pockets for change.
"What kind of cigarettes are these?",looks at machine with a puzzled look.
"What the hell are winstons,slims,concords,blunts,? No lucky strikes? Not even the cheaper big cheifs.",goes back to bar with puzzlement and sits down. Reaches for a bottle near him,takes a drink,shouts at the direction of the kitchen,
"Hey Lord Draud this stuff tastes like water."
looks at label,H.O.L.Y.W.A.T.E.R 100 proof Rome.yells back toward kitchen,
"Never mind it was water. I thought you said this stuff would help me. I dont fell a thi.."
jetblue thrashes violently in the air as the water dissolves the undead in him causing intense pain. finally after a minute of screaming he colapses from pain near the feet of TrueSephiroth where he uses his body as a convenient foot stool.





*come on you guys add some story elements. Any body. Im running out of Ideas. Soon Im just goona sit at the bar and get tore-up drunk with Lord Draud.No one wants to read that.*:)

[TrueSephiroth]

|Sorry I've been absent lately my computer has been down since Friday and sitll is.|

I won't get sick from them, you know I'm immune to status ailments with my Ribbon equipped.

As for your pain I think you should be more careful as of what you eat.
Now Ksaa since that machines been unplugged forawhile I don't think you should eat anymore of the sandwhich and start heading for the bathroom.
I don't think you want to be running to the bathroom like a Chocobo when it finally does catch up to you.

[Ksaa]

Ksaa takes a big bite out of the sandwhich, and gets a foul responce, thus dropping it. "URK!!! wuzza in dis sam'age????" Suddenly the sandwhich starts scooting around, and trying to escape, "AHHHH!!!!" using a Mage's Cane that phased in, he proceeds to bash the heck out of the sandwhich, throwing in a few Fire spells.
Satisfied that the demon sandwhich was crushed and fried, he phased over to the White Mage, and cast Anitidote on himself.
There was a low growl,a nd the fried sandwhich latched to the bottom on his robe. "Thats it!" Storming outside with it still attached to his robe, raising his arms a bolt of Lightening fell form the sky and left the sandwhich in dust.
Going back inside, he turned to True Sephiroth and asked, "Man, dude!!! i know dey a bit old.... but wudda you put IN those?!"

[Lord Draud]

thoes have been tehre long befor i can into this place recomend eating them i do not! here you go ehres your food

[jetblue]

The lightning bolt sends electricity coursing through the ground waking jetblue.
"Oo..man,that felt like acid. Why is my hair standing up?"staggers up walks toward bar.
"Why is there smoke coming out of my mouth?"trys to cough.
"That was some powerful stuff. Good thing I did'nt eat more of that burger. I never want to go through that again."see's Lord Draud come out of kitchen with a huge plate of ribs dripping with BBQ sauce.
"OH ribs let me at them!"starts to eat and makes a pig of himself.
"More napkins and some bread please Lord Draud and heres a $30, keep the change"l
"Hey TrueSephiroth,Ksaa,Giea want some ribs? There delicious. I cant eat them all by myself now",drips sauce onto shirt,does'nt care,
"Hey guys after Im done eating where do we go next? Do we find the dragon or find out why so many people dissapeared?"licks fingers,
"Or whatever you guys want. I got a new car outside since my last one dissapeared. Its the new model 1948 plymouth. We can all jump in and go to the ...er....beach or something.".......

[Lord Draud]

thinks to him self.....filthy mortals ".......there is plently of ribs for all, also please do not kill my zombie slaves they are not overly hard to replace how ever it shows a lack of respect for me and this resturant, sweet 30 bucks!"

[TrueSephiroth]

|Excuse me again for not answering sooner. Oddessey of my computer continues.|

I got the deliveryguy to change out the food in the Vending machine so It shouldn't be a problem. As for what there are they're supposed to be ham.
Guess not.

I don't care where we go just that we do something.

[Lord Draud]

can i come too i need to work on my tan?

[TrueSephiroth]

I thought you were evil?
Why would you want to come with us. A couple of goodie goodies and a chaotic-neutral semievil demigod?

As for taking your car; I prefer my portal.

[Lord Draud]

well there is nothing going on here and while yes i could will my self tehre as well its more fun to be going at dangouse speeeds

[jetblue]

jetblue finishes his ribs and makes a loud belch,looks for a drink and reaches for a bottle not knowing its holy water,
"Ok lets look for D-rex. And if the search leads to the beach so be it",holds bottle,about to put near lips when he hears Lord Draud,
"Of course you can come. The zombies can run the place while were gone"
puts bottle down on table and reaches in his pockets for car keys,
"Since TrueSephiroth and Ksaa will teleport,you drive Lord Draud.",tosses car keys to Lord Draud,"I got shotgun."
"You do know how to drive right?".......





*guys I am so running out of Ideas*

[Lord Draud]

erg um shure i know its like riding a horse you never forget what you got a modle T?

[Hierlark16]

Argh! I've been away for too long. I come back to the forum after 4 months and there's a new one entirely. Kudos to Locke for pulling this all together and saving it. Hey - has anyone played Star OCean 3 yet? It looks interesting.

[jetblue]

(Howdy Hierlark 16http://www.rpgamers.info/images/smilies/smile.gif )


"Thats funny. A model-T.My grand dad has one."
"Its a 1948 plymouth,stick shift....you do know how to drive stick dont chya?",jetblue again reaches for the bottle on the table.
"Order your zobies to take care of the place and let's go",walks out door with bottle in hand.
"TrueSephiroth and Ksaa go on ahead to the beach on lake michigan,we will meet you there.",
jetblue is amazed how Ksaa changes the color of his robe and touches the ground with his mages staff and a pentagram of white light appears and engulfs him and he is gone.
Then TrueSephiroth pulls out his masamune blade from his back sheath,touches the ground with the blade and raises his other hand and starts to glow with blue light,then a energy bolt shoots down on him from the sky and with a loud clap and he is gone.
"Come on Lord Draud get in and when I start pushing pull on the choke and dont push the ignition switch until Im inside the car.",starts to push the car but turns around and yells,
"Hey Giea want to come along?".......

[Lord Draud]

shure 8hops in the car* um let see..............

[TrueSephiroth]

(You are so cool with that stuff you should right a story like Charon did in the last board. Any one know how to get to the old board archives I've been serchin. I want Ksaa to read the story and the sequel)

*After teleporting in, sees Ksaa playing on the icey beaches of the Lake saying a strange spell*
*POP!!*
*One of the hermit crabs becomes huge and he starts riding him around*

I hope he clamps his claw on your ass nice and tight.

I wonder when those guys will get here?

*waits a few hours while Ksaa has fun running around with the hermit crab*

I'll give them an entire day then I'm gonna bring them here myself.

[Ksaa]

"YeeeHAAAAA!!" Ksaa said riding the carb. After a while the crab starts bucking, and throws off Ksaa, then immediatly begins to chase after him. "Oh maaaan! not AGIN!" TrueSephiroth smiled, and Ksaa take his Mage's Staff to whack the crab in the head, and leaped over, shifting to a Hunter Class; as he landed, he now wore a helmet looking hat, and some not loose yet not tight clothes. Taking his bow as the crab turned, he used his Vital Aim shot to nail the crab inbetween the eyes.
"That was fun?" TrueSephiroth.
"Ya.... dang!" Ksaa replied
"What?"
"I'm outta crabs!!"

[Zedie9]

Any one know how to get to the old board archives I've been serchin. I want Ksaa to read the story and the sequel).
Here: http://www.rpgamers.net/cgi-bin/board/boardpower.cgi

:)

[TrueSephiroth]

Yaa we get to see the old stuff.

The Story. (http://www.rpgamers.net/cgi-bin/board/discussion.cgi?forum=10&discussion=540&page=7)
The Sequel. (http://www.rpgamers.net/cgi-bin/board/discussion.cgi?forum=10&discussion=649&page=8)

[Lord Draud]

* increases the cars speed with a simple spell* now this is fun do you know that if we go any faster you eyes will implode? we should be there right.................NOW *hits the breaks and watches jet go flying* should have worn a seat belt

[jetblue]

jetblue lands on the dirty sand on a broken bottle,gets up and spits out a bottle cap.
"My god I made it alive",shakes sand from hair,
"Thats the last time I let you drive my car",takes off overcoat,
"I should of took the keys away when you poured that nitro down the tank,but thats what I get for listening to you. My god 150 mph down a residential street.Your lucky that the car only flipped over 6 times and landed right side up.",lossens tie and pulls up his shirt cuffs.
"And why did I listen to you again when you said we needed a chaufer. The moment you put that zombie behind the wheel he drove us off a damn cliff."
limps over to car and holds on for support. Looks around.
"TrueSephiroth and Ksaa got be around here somewhere. I hope they had better luck than we did finding the dragon."coughs sand from throat.
"And why did you honk the horn and whistle at those girls for on that street back there? I kept telling you they were'nt hookers."raises voice at Lord Draud.
"And when those girls gave you the finger and made that remark about your face you did'nt have to try and run them over."looks at Lord Draud with shame.
"I thought we would never lose there gangbanger boyfreinds. They chased us for over 20 miles. That was the worst car chase I was ever in. I thought they had us there if it were'nt fot that spell you just used.",looks at all the dents on the front of his car.Kicks front bumper.
"I knew I should of paid for Insurance".looks sadly at his car.......

[Lord Draud]

" can you blame me for it? i eman they where HOT and there buy freinds were nothing to me or you i could have sneezed and added there rotting corpes to me army, and was it not all FUN when your immortal its had to do fun stuff" looks at the car " its seems ok let me just fix that" casts a mending spell and the car is like brank new*

[TrueSephiroth]

Damn it where are they?!

I'm gonna fly around for a bit maybe they are close.

*winds starts wipping around him, then he goes straight up and starts a low flight pattern*

Ahha! There they are!

*flys down to meet them*

Seems like you've had fun.
*Points to the craters from Jetblue and the car*